What did you want to be?
You know when you’re a kid you have all these…”when I grow up” ideas?!
Well, I had a few too. I knew when I grew up I wanted to have at least one husband…I’m not gonna lie when I was 10 it was hard to decide which one it would be.
Then I of course, wanted kids….probably 6-8 but I had more names picked out then that…. so that put me in a quandary until I figured out if I would give each of my kids 3 names I could use all those beautiful names.
I also wanted to be a great singer…like the kind people pay to see.
Like Amy Grant.
She Rocked the house!
I sang her all the way until about 16 then I realized there were even better singers.
There were several things I thought would not be fun to be at all….
Like a preachers wife. Or maybe a farmers wife. And I certainly wasn’t gonna have kids that didn’t cooperate and behave themselves. And I didn’t wanna be all caught up in a job.
And Here are some of those little characters on our front porch with their friends.
(they aren’t all mine….I haven’t been hiding the rest in the basement….but if they were all mine I have the names all picked out…)
You know what? Life has a way of kind of changing some of those things.
I mean ideals.
Not that I have become this cynical old grouchy mom.
But rather, I realize the reality of what I thought as a young girl and a good dose of livin that when mixed together don’t always = Happily ever after.
Now I know that in my head….but in my heart I often ask….why me?
Why my kids? Why this plan? Why this house? Why this situation? Why this town?Why?
And sometimes I hear this….
“BECAUSE I SAID SO!”
Really? You got nothing else?
No explanation why? Nothing for me other then that?
And again I hear….
“That’s right, this is my plan”.
And I am left to figure out what I will do with this plan. What do I do with “Because I said so”.
Will I be the daughter who rebels to this, who runs from it, or will I be the one who says,
“Not my will but yours“
Tough words for this Strong Willed PK to say sometimes.
And because of this,
I honestly think I am Right.Where.I.Should.Be!
When I can give it up then I am surrendered and ready to use my passion for him!